I was diagnosed when I was 22. I lived in my room and was on disability for 12 years, after being a publicist in the Silicon Valley for eight years. About two years ago I woke up and said "I want to go back to work!" Well it almost killed me. It was/is a professional job, I am currently a Document Revision Specialist for a chemicals firm and I create documents and revise them. I do documents and manuals for all departments. I am smart and capable but my energy cycles, it is so hard just to get to work I want to cry. Work has made my life is miserable. I can't handle working full-time, and under so much pressure, and I am so low energy after all that output, that I am going back on disability once I give my notice in December. I will convalesce for a month, I am sure, and then I do intend to get a part-time job.

You can imagine how hard it might be to find someone, but I would rather be alone than with the wrong person. And don't mistake me for weak or desperate. I am strong in spirit and I will not and I do not give myself to someone lightly.

I have such a high propensity to love. I may have said this elsewhere, but I think for me I have always wanted to work for a man I loved. Help him with his business, help him with the house, make dinners, make his lunch, do things that make ME happy.And that is by giving and take care of someone who really loves me. Being a slave out there -- oh, I wish I could (I would not be single, that I can tell you, I see the way men look at me), but in a way maybe there's a reason I am unable maintain the psychological stamina. I have bipolar 1, stabilized 6 years, no psychosis.

** I don't believe in signs so if I could slice that astrology part out of my profile I certainly would! Bothers me. It's like "Let me classify myself and stop it with the tomfoolery!" I am not that irritated, but kinda. Certain things I have learned to respect and other things to regard with utter disdain.